I’ve been alone

and I’ve been lonely.

I’ve been in despair

over my one and only.

I’ve known pain

and I’ve known sorrow.

I’ve lived on time

I’ve had to borrow.

I’ve faced demons

from outside and within.

But, you’re the only monster

whom I’ll face and never win.

© Autumn Siders 2016

I hate to leave the warmth of your arms

but the silence is unsettling and I gently escape.

As I tiptoe across the cold wood floor,

your eyes gaze my way, asking for more.

I flip the record over and gently place the needle down,

waiting for the windmill of Townshend to drown

the silence and the pain from my busy brain

and I settle back into your arms and your warmth

and wait for this high, that only you can bring.

© Autumn Siders 2016

There are few things in this life

which can scare me to the core

as fear is something foreign

to me, no more than tragic lore.

But, the more time I spend

on this planet we call earth,

the more I tend to think

some fear has it’s worth.

My list, while it may be short

contains a scary thing or two:

a blank page, a mirror,

and how I feel for you.

© Autumn Siders 2016

When did the minivan

become a clown car?

This random thought

overtakes my mind

as I watch kid #10

pile out of the van,

screaming and running

through a parking lot

while their mom waddles out,

cigarette in mouth

and I try not to judge

as kid #3 pees

on a dying tree

but how odd I must be,

as I sit

quietly, alone, smokeless,

and of all things,

I pee indoors.

© Autumn Siders 2016

Empty words and broken promises

were the foundation on which we built,

aimlessly hoping for a  mansion

instead of this crumbling mess of guilt.

Now, this abandoned construction site

contains the wreckage of our endeavor

and under the rubble piled high,

I know now, our love was not forever.

© Autumn Siders 2016