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Pointless

I fail to see your point,
yet again.

Remind me if you will,
why it matters?

All this time you waste
on what can never be.

All these feelings,
come from nowhere.

How much of your life
have you wasted away?

How much of your soul
is eaten away?

How little you lived,
how little you loved
and still you are blind
to the signs from above.

© Autumn Siders 2018

#tbt

I try so hard to control
every little detail of life,
a distraction so divine,
that I forget to live.
I want to let go,
I want to be free
but it’s the details
that hold control of me.

I try so hard to forgive
those who cannot live
up to my expectations.

But no matter what,
a part of me always
pities the way
mere mortals live.

© Autumn Siders 2009

I Always Knew

I always knew I missed you,
I just never knew how much
until you walked away
and I was left without your touch.

I always knew I loved you,
I just never put to words
how much you filled my life
like the singing of the birds.

I always knew I cared,
I just never was able to show
and now it’s much too late
and my heart beats much too slow.

© Autumn Siders 2018

Never Belonged

You could ask me today
if I’d come back to you
and the answer is no,
I’d rather not be blue.
You could have asked back then
if I wanted to stay
and my heart would have pulled
thinking it would be okay.
You could ask me tomorrow
where we went wrong
and I’d answer simply,
we never belonged.

© Autumn Siders 2018

2767

Happenstance brought me to you
and fate sent you away,
a fate sealed by my wrongs
making it impossible to stay.
I knew that my actions
would give me this result
and still I carried on
without an ounce of doubt.
Would I change my ways now?
I can honestly say, “no.”
But my heart will remember you,
anywhere I go.

© Autumn Siders 2018